Expectations

Expectations are a dangerous thing. Sometimes we go into something thinking it's going to be so totally awesome and then are disappointed when it doesn't live up to our hype.

"Maybe this HP movie will be amazing! Oh... no... not quite."

Sometimes, we think something is going to be so totally awesome and then SURPRISE! It actually is.

Avengers, anyone?

Sometimes, I don't have any expectations at all, and then end up VERY pleasantly surprised.

Don't cry, Stefan, your show is amazing!

Sometimes, I don't have any expectations at all, and then end up unsurprised and undisappointed (I know that's not a word) when it sucks.

I thought this movie would be crap and it was. Moving on.

Sometimes, we expect something specific, and then end up disappointed when that something specific doesn't happen. For example, after watching the first episode of Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., my hubs said to me, "that wasn't what I was expecting at all." He didn't like the show as much as I did because he thought there would be superheroes in the show and I knew there wouldn't be. He thought there would be more, and when there wasn't, he was disappointed.

So why am I talking about expectations? The Scorpio Races, that's why. When I picked up this book, I expected two things:

ONE: that I would most likely love it because it's by one of my fave authors, Maggie Stiefvater.

TWO: that the book would be ABOUT a race.

This second expectation was what kind of lost the book for me. Yes, The Scorpio Races is about a race. BUT. This race doesn't happen until the VERY END of the book and it only lasts a chapter or two. For some reason, I went into this book thinking at least half, if not three quarters of the book would take place DURING the race. Think, Hidalgo. So when I started reading, and then reading some more, and more, getting a hundred pages, two hundred pages in, and STILL no race? I was a bit disappointed. I kept waiting for this big race to happen and got very impatient with the book when it didn't.

Was this a reasonable expectation for me to have? Maybe, maybe not. But I had it, nevertheless. I couldn't get rid of it. And it colored my opinion about the book.

HOWEVER. Expectation number one did end up coming true. I did like the book, A LOT, because Stiefvater didn't disappoint in any other way. The characters were good and the world vivid. I felt for both Puck and Sean. I teared up. She ended the book perfectly. The book was GOOD. But sadly, I can't say I loved it based on that one ridiculous expectation that didn't come true.

Be careful of expectations. Unfortunately, sometimes we can't help them. There was really nothing that said the book would take place mostly during the race, I just thought it would. Sometimes, we can't avoid expectations. We can't shake them. The best we can do is move beyond, whether that means seeing what did live up when something did not, or saying, it wasn't great, oh well, moving on.

What do you think?

What's Up Wednesday: Royals and Shoes

What’s Up Wednesday is a weekly blog hop with other folks on this writing journey. With that aim in mind, if you want to join us, we encourage you to visit a few other WUW blogs each week, get to know some other writers, and spread some writerly love! Don't forget to leave the link to your post on Jaime's blog.

WHAT I'M READING
I finished The Scorpio Races on Sunday and started The Dream Thieves on Tuesday. It's Maggie Stiefvater week! I've got things to say about The Scorpio Races but I think I'll leave them for their own blog post. The Dream Thieves is starting out great, I just don't remember who the Gray Man is. Am I supposed to? I thought about rereading The Raven Boys but finally decided that I'd rather do a reread before the last book comes out. (BTW, thanks to Jaime who let me know that Maggie Stiefvater is coming to the bookstore just minutes away from me!!! I really hope I get to go see her!)

WHAT I'M WRITING
I'm more than halfway through on my EPONINE edits. I'm pretty happy with a lot of the writing but I'm still worried about some stuff- mainly a few of my secondary characters. One of my CPs currently has my first half, I'm hoping that she'll be able to tell me if I need more fleshing out. (I have a feeling that I do.)

WHAT INSPIRES ME RIGHT NOW
I've loved Royals by Lorde since I first heard it, but yesterday when it came on the radio, I had one of those moments where I see a scene from my manuscript play out like a movie. I know TV has already stolen this song, and I'm sure at least one movie will too, but now I will always think of Royals as part of the soundtrack to EPONINE.

WHAT ELSE I'VE BEEN UP TO
Thanksgiving! We had a great dinner with awesome food and lots of family. I made a pretty tasty peanut butter chocolate brownie thing, and there was even some left over, but then my daughter kicked her shoe off in the car on the way home and guess where it fell? It didn't land right in the dessert, but her feet stunk so bad that there's no way that some of it didn't sink in.

Happy Thanksgiving!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!

While you crazy Americans are at work right now, I'm doing this:

And this:

And this:

And this, because I like to eat and read at the same time:

 

So again I say, HAPPY THANKSGIVING! And I'll see you on Wednesday if I've managed not to eat myself into a coma. (Which is slightly ironic considering last Friday's post.)



 



Food Issues

A few days ago, I was talking to a CP about doing a treat reward with writing. Write so many words and then get a yummy treat! Sounds like a great idea but I opted out.

Why? I've got food issues.

It didn't used to be this way. All through high school, I could eat pretty much what I wanted and stay the same weight. I was never the skinny-mini, nor was I overweight. I gained the freshman fifteen at college (and after) but lost it on a very unhealthy diet of a supersized McDonald's meal once a day (no joke). Even during four pregnancies, I gained the appropriate amount of weight, 30-35lbs, and even though it got harder after each birth to lose it again, I always did.

Once number four was born, I decided I'd really get in shape. I'd exercise. I wanted to look good and lose that baby belly. So I went on Weight Watchers. I didn't actually go to the meetings or get weighed, but I did it all at home. I kept a food diary, keeping track of every single thing I put in my mouth and how many points it was worth. I obsessed over food. It became all I thought about. On cheat days, I would gorge myself so bad on junk, I'd make myself sick.

I'm not gonna lie, Weight Watchers worked. And I'm not knocking the program- if you use it right, you get results, while still getting to eat foods that you love. I weighed less than I did in high school. I thought I had it all under control so I went off the program. I already knew what I should and shouldn't eat and how big portion sizes should be. It would be easy, right?

Hahahahahaha. (That's me, laughing maniacally at myself.) I gained it all back plus some. DUH. For awhile, I didn't care. I thought, no one else cares about how much I weigh except me, so why bother? I want to enjoy life, not starve. I felt sort of like this:

Then I saw a picture of myself while in Hawaii and thought ICK. So I tried the LoseIt app. Then quit. Then tried again. Then quit. I exercised. Then quit. Then exercised. Then quit.

See what I mean about issues? I eat when I'm stressed. When I'm tired. When I'm in a bad mood. Not only that, but I LOVE food. The good stuff as well as most of the bad. In fact, I'm surprised that I haven't been bigger, gained more. (Thank you metabolism. I guess you're still chugging away.)

I needed a change. I didn't want to go back to obsessing over food to the point that it controlled my life. Nor did I want to go back to not caring. So I decided that I needed an in-between. I needed to just Make. Better. Choices.

I don't keep a food diary, I don't measure out portions. But I go for healthier things. Instead of a two cheeseburgers meal and regular fries at McDonald's, I eat a grilled chicken snack wrap and a small fries. Instead of eating chimichangas for lunch (LOVE those), I eat a lot of salads. (Funny enough, I eat more salads now than I did on Weight Watchers. I think it's because I don't have to measure out each portion of vegetables.) When I eat something I probably shouldn't have (like last night's mozza sticks and Whopper Jr.), I don't beat myself up about it. Also, I've exercised pretty consistently since January. I've gotten enough into a routine that it doesn't take much thought to do it. I even enjoy it- or more likely, I enjoy the TV shows I watch while doing it.

I'm trying to get a better mentality when it comes to food. I'm trying to make those better choices. This is something I know I'll wrestle with my entire life, and it doesn't just have to do with food, but with my mental state (that sounds bad). This is something I definitely cannot connect with my writing.

So wish me luck, or give me a kick in the pants if you see me eating chips.

What's Up Wednesday: Scorpio and Sleepy

I'm back (I forgot to post on Monday) for What's Up Wednesday, a weekly bloghop hosted by Jaime Morrow and Erin Funk.

What I'm Reading

Right now I'm a hundred or so pages into The Scorpio Races by Maggie Stiefvater. I love everything she's written so far, but I'm still on the fence about this one. The world building is amazing and the characters rich (as usual in her books), but it's taking me some time to get into it. I'm not quitting though. It's Stiefvater for crying out loud.

What I'm Writing
On Monday I started my revisions on EPONINE. My first drafts are mostly dialogue and inner thoughts, so I have a lot of setting and description to fill in. Also, when I was about halfway through, I went back and changed up a few characteristics of my MC so I'm watching for inconsistencies now. What I have trouble seeing on my first revision is bigger picture plot things. That's why I love my CPs so much.

What Inspires Me Right Now
Way back a year ago when I was just starting this WIP, I searched online for the perfect actress to portray my MC Eponine Thorpe. And I found her. Everything about this picture completely captures the way I see her.

Alexz Johnson

What Else I've Been Up To
Shoot. I hate this question. Because it seems like all I do is clean, read, spend time with my kids, write, eat, sleep, and watch TV, sometimes more than one of those at once. Like right now, I'm writing this and watching a PVR'd episode of Sleepy Hollow. "What's your name? Tall, dark, and British?" Ha, good line. (And my favorite kind. ;) ) So, what have you been up to?

Eponine

Now that I'm done my manuscript, I feel like I can actually talk about it. I like to stay mum about things, for one because I know there are stealers out there who actually NAB ideas from other writers! I know! I was shocked when I heard about it too (this has happened to a few authors and it makes me so very sad). And since I'm not the fastest writer out there, I really didn't want to announce to the world that I'm doing an Eponine retelling. Not that I have the patent on this idea or anything, but still. And for two, I didn't want to jinx said idea, because I wasn't sure if I could actually pull it off.

To be honest, I'm still not sure I did. I'm scared about my low word count, I'm scared about my shoddy world building, I'm scared that this story JUST DIDN'T WORK. I'm scared that my MC is totally unlikeable or unrelateable, that my love interest isn't that desirable, and that my secondary characters are flat and boring (LIKE THEY ALWAYS ARE).

Basically, I'm scared.

But I'm also super excited about this idea. I've always loved the character of Eponine from Les Mis... or should I say, from the musical Les Mis. In the book, she's not that likable. More than a year ago I was watching the 25th Anniversary DVD of Les Mis, my heart breaking (as it always does) when Eponine sings On My Own, and crying (as I always do) when Eponine and Marius sing A Little Fall of Rain. So during all this breaking heart and crying, I thought, WOULDN'T HER STORY BE SO GOOD ON ITS OWN? WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO MAKE IT MODERN?

Cue a few months later when I decided, WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT IF I MADE THIS STORY URBAN FANTASY? (I'm still not sure if that was great or not.)

Cue another year later and I'm done and I still think GREAT GREAT GREAT mixed in with a lot of SCARED FRIGHTENED and HOLY CRAP WHAT DID I JUST WRITE?

On Monday, when I pick this thing back up again, I'll get to see just how crappy/great it turned out. So, here's to first drafts! *clink* And here's to revising! *clink clink*

And here's to Eponine.

What's Up Wednesday: Say Something

 

What’s Up Wednesday is a weekly blog hop with other folks on this writing journey. With that aim in mind, if you want to join us, we encourage you to visit a few other WUW blogs each week, get to know some other writers, and spread some writerly love! Link up on Jaime Morrow's blog or Erin Funk's blog.

 

What I'm Reading

I'm reading and LOVING United We Spy by Ally Carter, the last book in her Gallagher Girls series. I love Ally Carter's books and this one hasn't disappointed so far. Here's a teaser:

 

HOW TO SNEAK OUT OF YOUR SCHOOL AND CROSS THE ATLANTIC WITHOUT A WHOLE BUNCH OF SPIES BEING THE WISER:

(A list by Cameron Morgan)

- Secret passageways. I know I've mentioned these before, but seriously. My academic experience would have been extremely different without them.

- Roommates with private jets. Again, this makes things a lot easier. I'm not saying that we couldn't have stowed away on a cargo ship (that was Bex's original idea), but when Macey made a phone call and said, "The jet will be here in twenty," we didn't exactly protest.

- Don't go where you're going. No. Really. So you want to go to Rome to break out your roommate's boyfriend... the last think you do is fly to Rome. Too obvious. Too easy to track. And, besides, we were in Macey's mom's private jet. There were going to be flight plans and manifests and stuff. So Rome was absolutely not our destination.

- Pack carefully (because even a rolling bag can be inconvenient in a high-speed chase, especially one involving cobblestones).

- Be careful. (page 52-53)

 

What I'm Writing

Nothing! I'm taking a week off from my finished WIP. The past couple of days I did a little bit of beta-ing, and I'm stewing an idea in my brain for NaNo, but that's it.

 

What Inspires Me Right Now

I love dance so much and there was this one from So You Think You Can Dance (one of many!) that really spoke to me because it fit right in with my manuscript. The story of best friends but one is in love with the other is just PERFECT. The song has been added to my MS playlist. If the video doesn't work, check out Say Something by A Great Big World, or Amy and Robert's dance Say Something from this year's SYTYCD.

 

 

What Else I've Been Up To

Yesterday was the start of October so, being the keener that I am, I put up all my Halloween stuff! Which isn't a whole lot, but it was still fun and the kids go crazy for the decorations. Here's just a bit of what I have up:

My front hall

 

So what's new with you?